Cutting to the chase – we are talking about drug test. Ever opened an email from HR and felt as if your heart is skipping? Like the “fill this cup” no matter if you are clean or not. whether you are an alcohol aficionado who loves to blab about that one time you got a bit too carried away or the pot head that is always MIA, sometimes it feels like to be the guy getting dragged on stage to fill in for karaoke.
Drug tests have the simple goal of catching any evidence of substance use that’s it. So it’s like a outer layer cake (more like a mille crepe) of different stuffsTests will usually include looking at urine, hair, blood, or saliva. The urine test is the most commonly talked about “needs to be on every street corner” of the drug test world. Hair tests are more of that unseen vampire that would take the mission of uncovering long forgotten secrets they feel are a dustbin in history as an obsession
The tales of the detox are the stuff for the ages. This penicillin apple juice, the cranberry juice that will save a life? Not so much. It is all about knowing the science of the timelines – how long substances like to fail you like this in a yoga game of hide and seek.
If you ever feel that you are targeted, take a breath. The employers are just trying to make sure they can keep everyone in a comfortable space.
Urban myths in this area are great. Dave was convinced that he would be ruined by his love for poppy seed muffins
Ut we don’t need to reenact scenes from horror movies with the test administrators. Engaging in some light talk helps bring down the energy of the situation. They are only humans like us and just doing their job.
Why do these drug tests scare the living heck out of people though? A close guess would be it has something to do with the control or invasion of privacy. If you can understand why you are giving blood or urine someone at a hospital everything else is just semantics and less intimidating Hopefully you can keep your head up laugh little about all of this and remember it’s just a fun house with some serious sucker punch moments